Towards Gulf

Sunday, November 30, 2014

From the land where I come from, every house would have at least one individual living/earning in the "Gulf". Predominately if asked, "where do you work?" the answer is "Gulf". No one cares which company or the nature of the job. This was a decade ago scenario which I am sure still prevails in most part of the gods own country.

Solution to any issues pertaining the growing up teenage would be to send him off to Gulf - which will fix his life. If you find anyone jobless guy, doing small time errands, and you ask out of concern, "what is your plan?" invariably the response would be, "I am waiting for so-and-so to send me a visa." I have grown up seeing this and never had a liking to this whole gulf thingy.

Every marriage proposal would be from some part of the gulf and no matter how much you avoid, the majority of them are in the Gulf. I detested the long-distance relationship which most of my family girls are still in. There are lucky people who get to take their family along, but I could never imagine a life where I had to be alone after marriage.

When I got to know that the man I am getting married to is also from the Gulf - and that too from KSA - I was a wee bit upset. But I was glad we both were on the same page, i.e NO LONG DISTANCE relationship. I began my research on this country but my hubby wasn't very keen in getting me to Yanbu stating that I wouldn't like this place as I would not be able to cope with the restrictions and the dress codes. Love is blind in this case, I told him I want to live with him even if it was a hell.


I was very clear in my head as to what I need and was very clear of what I am gonna lose in this process. Everything I heard about life in KSA was negative. Having lived independently, in a country with freedom everywhere, this was hard to digest. He planned that we be together for our first anniversary. I was mentally prepared, I shopped a couple of abayas (dress code for woman in KSA), quit my job and was prepared to be the "Home Maker". Here I come Yanbu! It took us a year before we could be together.

Life here is very simple. I think myself as a queen. He has to accompany me everywhere, drive me around, wait until I finish shopping, or yet shop together groceries. And any urgent requirement, he has to step out to get them. Pampered! This was how I had to think of my dependency on him and I deliberately think positive in  every negative thing that I face here. There are moments I get that "why can't I do it myself",  I close my eyes and thank Allah for we are together now.

Note: I have not used the taxi service here. I have heard there are taxi service in other major cities which woman use to move about the city to shop, etc.

A quote my friend sent me this morning.


It is highly recommended to be POSITIVE and be GRATEFUL whenever you feel this place is NOT me. 

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5 Thoughts

  1. Good work Fami!!!!!! would love to see more.....

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  2. I love the way you have so gracefully nurtured a positive attitude about such huge change in your life. Proud of you dear one! Loved reading this article too. Keep sharing!!

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  3. You have rightly said a lot in your first para. The evil of dowry system is another cause for many a parent to look for some quick savings and extra finance to get their daughters married. Hope one day people will realize their folly and make marriages simple so that the Society lives a peaceful life. Welcome to KSA and hope your stay is fruitful as you can visit the holiest places and get all the blessings of Allah and his Prophet (saw).

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    Replies
    1. I am not sure if it is dowry system in my region. Dowry is at the lowest and considered a shame by most of the family. May be is the otherway round, the men gotta give Meher on the nikah day... and of course the wedding expense.. I agree with you on that.. we got to make marriages simple...

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